First Fall

I wonder how many falls i have to make before i can completely accomplish my goals.  Okay so i failed.  The reason why i missed to write a new post the past days was my failure to meet my daily schedules.  I was just bothered by a lot of things, especially my finances.  My smart got redirected and soon to be disconnected.  My loan was not released yet.  I was worried if I could still pursue my plan to get an Iphone.  Then I got caught with a flu.  My allergic rhinitis struck me and i ran out of Apple Cider Vinegar.   I had to wake Ng Lucila, our office clerk to borrow her bottle of ACV. 

How i missed Papa so much!  Whenever i was afflicted with asthma or rhinitis,  he knew the kind of care i needed.  He would cook for me a hot soup, compel me to take my meds and remind me to avoid cold water and soy sauce, even chocolate. Though it was painful to gasp for air to breathe, the pain was bearable because he was always there, for me and my brothers.  Ah, i couldnt cry anymore.  My rhinitis became more painful each time i cried.

I guess God had one purpose for me in my father's demise.  He wantedi me to be strong and independent.  I became so dependent  on him in almost everything and i strayed from my relationship with God as my life was so comfortable.  For the same reason, i also lost Donald.  When you give too much of yourself on something or someone, it would not be long when it would be taken away from you provided that you maintain your relationship with the Lord. 

God is a jealous God and too much of everything can lead to idolatry.  From now on, i will forget about men.  I will develop a prayer habit and start from there.  Can tall trees really bend?


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